They don't pay enough Pokedollars for this shit.
Honestly, it's about time the Mushroom Kingdom had an actual election - Peach has been the unquestioned autocratic monarch for way too long, and if Mario truly stands for freedom, democracy is the only answer. Note: any resemblance to actual people or events is purely coincidental.
Sonic runs around at incredible speeds, but maybe he needs to slow down and consider the consequences of his actions.
The humble origins of the internet's favorite hero...