The unofficial celebrity biography of Mary-Kate Olsen, brought to spoiled rotten life by Elaine Carroll. Featuring Bodyguard, Fat Professor, and obscene wealth.
Raise Your Hand
I can't raise my hand. I'm allergic to effort.
War -- what is it good for? Cute uniforms.
Jewish Looking Girl
She's a rock star of David.
Call My Phone
Sing along! Actually no, just find my phone.
It's always the bodyguard you least suspect.
Mary-Kate and Bodyguard may have effed up and effed.
Mary-Kate sabotages Professor in front of the school board.
First one to fall asleep gets a hand in warm Pellegrino.
Mary-Kate challenges Bodyguard to some 1am Pictionary.
Dinner with Hoffman
The Oscar creeper sabotages Mary-Kate and Sarkozy's date.
Mary-Kate writes her teacher evaluations, and Fat Professor forms a rebuttal.