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Very Mary-Kate

Very Mary-Kate

2 Seasons

The unofficial celebrity biography of Mary-Kate Olsen, brought to spoiled rotten life by Elaine Carroll. Featuring Bodyguard, Fat Professor, and obscene wealth.

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Very Mary-Kate
  • Raise Your Hand

    Episode 1

    I can't raise my hand. I'm allergic to effort.

  • Magazines

    Episode 2

    Magazines are sooo heavy. Especially the ones with pictures of fat people.

  • Jetlag

    Episode 3

    Can't sleep? Count sheepskin boots.

  • Santa

    Episode 4

    Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house, I was shuffling around chain smoking and trying on different shoes.

  • Presentation 4

    Episode 5

    War -- what is it good for? Cute uniforms.

  • Jewish Looking Girl

    Episode 6

    She's a rock star of David.

  • Layers

    Episode 7

    It's freezing cold under all these layers.

  • Call My Phone

    Episode 8

    Sing along! Actually no, just find my phone.

  • Trenta

    Episode 9

    Start the morning with a gallon of joe.

  • Evil Dragon

    Episode 10

    It's always the bodyguard you least suspect.

  • Police
    Episode 11


    Episode 11

    I fought the law and the law was a jerk face.

  • Jail
    Episode 12


    Episode 12

    Mary-Kate deals with life in the slammer.

  • Pillow Talk

    Episode 13

    Mary-Kate and Bodyguard may have effed up and effed.

  • Professor's Presentation

    Episode 14

    Mary-Kate sabotages Professor in front of the school board.

  • Slumber Party

    Episode 15

    First one to fall asleep gets a hand in warm Pellegrino.

  • Pills
    Episode 16


    Episode 16

    Take once per day with a picture of food.

  • Comet
    Episode 17


    Episode 17

    Mary-Kate's cat meows out against drugs.

  • Draw Something

    Episode 18

    Mary-Kate challenges Bodyguard to some 1am Pictionary.

  • Dinner with Hoffman

    Episode 19

    The Oscar creeper sabotages Mary-Kate and Sarkozy's date.

  • Instagram

    Episode 20

    Who wants daiquiris??? #nofilter

  • Evaluations

    Episode 21

    Mary-Kate writes her teacher evaluations, and Fat Professor forms a rebuttal.