Brennan & Tao share auto-erotic tips from the Carfax fox and realize everyone has a cousin Ray.

Katie and Ele Woods give Daddy Updates & report on what Henry Winkler has been making out to.

Caldwell Tanner & Ryan Creamer report on the hottest new festivals, from The Babadook to Cream Town.

Raph & Rekha ask "where are they now?" about Soviet space dogs & take a lady soap company to task.

Rekha interviews Lauren Lapkus on her winning entrant for the Biggest Hog Contest at the state fair.

Mary Holland and Grant break stories on a mascot update and a hot new celebrity power couple.

Vic Michaelis and Rekha report on a town that deserves rain, and a Wolf Blitzer tongue twister.

Mike Trapp interviews Mary Holland about a new movie that combines ABBA, Avatar, and the moon.

Patrick McDonald and Katie Marovitch try to cancel teeth, but get distracted by their side projects.

Lauren Lapkus and Mary Holland dive deep in the local business of a lame town.

Brian Huskey and Raph are a father-son news team with issues to work out (on air).

Shukri Abdi and Tao Yang report on summertime fun while Jess does the impression of her life.

John Milhiser and Jess Ross break a scandal about a sexy photo on a computer in Japan.

The no-laugh newsroom returns with a breaking report on a thicc-ass bird. You turd it fear cursed.

Ally, Grant, Trapp, and Emily Axford are here with all the info you could ever need on bed bugs and much, much more.

The only news team that doesn't know what they're about to read is back with an alarming teen trend.

Our reporters have no idea what they're about to read off their Teleprompter. If they laugh, they lose.

Rekha tells a meaty maternal story about Trapp, and Brennan dives into Breaking News lore.

A bunch of bugs bring you the latest in bug news. Buzz buzz!

The student news team at River View High School bring you the latest news on field trip tragedies.

Straight from the Vatican, our news team report that God just fucking HATES actor John Lithgow.

Trapp tries to name the worst Brians while Brennan explains exactly how to talk to your neighbors.

Kellen and Zac report on the truth behind hot dogs. Tao warns of a product recall on dildos.

Local man Roger rants about snake socks. Brennan reports from a county fair that’s lost its bear.